The Frylight Zone - Episode 6: She Came Back "Wong"
By The Frylight Staff
(The doorway opens up on what looks like a typical 30th-century street. Exit
our heroes, looking like they’ve just been through hell, and back, and then
through again)
Leela: That’s it! I’m sick of zombie universes and werewolf universes
and vampire universes… I’m just sick of universes!
Fry: Whattaya mean? That was so cool! The vampires were like (imitating Bela
Lugosi) BLAH! and you were like “eek!” and Amy was like “Nuh-uh!”,
and she goes all Buffy on them, and then we went for pizza and we were like “mmm,
yum, chomp”…
Amy: Um… guys?
Fry: And then the vampires came back, and we were like “pow!” and
they were like…
Amy: Guys…
Fry: What?
Amy: I don’t feel so good…
(She collapses)
(Opening credits. Caption: Region 1 viewers wait three years before reading)
(Interior of a 31st century hospital)
Fry: Someone, she needs help!
Leela: Anybody?
Nurse: Fill out these forms.
(She dumps a stack on the table)
Fry: But it’s an emergency!
Nurse: Can you prove it’s an emergency?
Fry: Well, no…
Nurse: If you can prove it’s an emergency…
(Suddenly, Amy convulses. Black veins start to stand out on her face…
)
Fry: How’s that?
Nurse: Can I see some pain here?
Amy: ARRRRRGGHH!!
Nurse: Some projectile vomiting would be -
Fry: JUST ADMIT HER!
Nurse: Fine, you don’t have to be a jerk about it…
(Ext. shot: Intensive care unit. Int. Amy’s in a diagnostic bed, with
Fry and Leela looking on…)
Doctor: I don’t understand it. (to Fry) You said she’s human, right?
Fry: Last time I asked her. Why?
Doctor: Well, for starters, neither of her hearts is where it should be.
Leela: “Neither”?
Doctor: Did I mention she has two now? That’s another thing. And she has
three lungs, four kidneys, two stomachs, no spleen, liver, or pancreas, but I
think this organ over here substitutes for them… and I have no idea WHAT
this one does…
Fry: Speak English, Doc! I don’t have time for your nerdy nerd-talk!
Doctor: What I’m saying, Mr… what is your name, anyway?
Fry: Fry. Like the way of cooking.
Doctor: Anyway, what I’m saying is that your girlfriend…
Fry: Oh, she’s not my girlfriend. I mean, yeah, we dated for a while,
but nothing serious…
Doctor: Can I please continue?
Fry: Sure.
Doctor: What I’m saying is that she may look human, but she isn’t.
In fact, she matches no known species.
Fry: Amy… not human?
Doctor: That’s what I said.
Fry: But what’s wrong with her?
Doctor: As far as I can tell, her very cellular structure’s starting to
break down. There’s nothing I can do.
Fry: Oh god. Well… could you at least wake her up… so I can say goodbye?
Doctor: Okay. (injects her with something) I’ll leave the two of you alone.
(Amy’s eyes flutter open…)
Amy: Fry?
Fry: I’m here, Amy.
Amy: Fry, I need to tell you something… (coughs)
Fry: What is it?
Amy: It’s so hard to say… but… I… I…
(Suddenly, a man in a surgical mask and outfit bursts in.)
Fry: Hey!
Surgeon: Please get out of my way. I need to get this patient to an operating
room immediately.
(He grabs hold of Amy’s bio-bed and begins wheeling her out)
Fry: Wait a minute! Who are you, and what do you think you’re doing?
Leela: Fry, leave him alone. I think he knows what he’s doing.
Fry: For all we know, HE sent him!
Surgeon: Do not interfere with me, Philip J. Fry. I am the only one who can
save your friend’s life.
(Bum-bum-BUM!)
(Meanwhile… on the REAL Earth….)
(Leela is sitting on the couch between Bender and Zoidberg. None of them are
saying or doing anything…)
Bender: So…
Leela: That’s it! I can’t stand this anymore!
Bender: Hey, what crawled up your ass, meatwad?
Leela: I just can’t believe we’re just sitting here while Fry is
lost in Oprah-only-knows what dimension.
Hermes: Ya crazy woman, the professor has been searching for a way to bring
them back day and night!
Leela: You don’t care either, do you?
Hermes: Leela -
Leela: They’ve been missing for weeks now, and all we’ve done is
everything reasonably possible!
Zoidberg: You should calm down, my friend. Stress makes human organs turn into
charcoal, or so my studies tell me.
Leela: I can’t calm down! Do you think Fry would be calm if any of us
was missing? No! He’d be out there, taking insanely stupid chances in the
infinitesimal hope that he could help us somehow! We owe it to Fry to be just
as stupid as he would be!
Scruffy: Amy’s missin’, too.
Leela (dismissive): Right, her too.
(enter Prof. Farnsworth)
Prof: Oh, my, I couldn’t help but overhear. In need of a giant flesh-eating
lizard, you say?
Leela: No, we want to help find Fry.
Zoidberg: And Amy.
Leela: Whatever.
Prof: Are you sure you don’t want a giant flesh-eating lizard? I’m
quite good at those.
Leela: I’m positive! I just want to find Fry!
Prof: Who’s Fry?
Leela: ARRRRRGGGHHHH!!!
(Meanwhile, back in the other dimension, in the OR)
Fry: What are you doing to her? Answer me! I need to know!
Leela: Fry: I think you’d better step back and let him do his job.
(The surgeon scans Amy with a variety of devices…)
Surgeon: Hmmm… ah, yes, I see the imbalance here. A fresh infusion of
Bannik cells should stabilize her permanently…
(He injects her with something… the black veininess begins to reverse.
Soon, she is healthy and resting comfortably.)
Surgeon: There… now she’ll be fine.
Fry: Great. Thanks. Now… mind telling me what this is all about?
Surgeon: Yes… yes, I believe the time for answers has arrived.
(He removes his surgical mask, revealing himself to be the Number 9 Man.)
Fry: Hey, I know you from street corners!
#9: Yes… I have been keeping tabs on you for some time, Philip Fry. I
represent the forces of Order.
Fry: O…kay….
#9: We are interested in seeing that you succeed in your task. Thus, when your
companion here was killed in action, we interceded and took her back to our sanctum
to revive her. Unfortunately… it was too late for her. So we did the next
best thing… we took an imprint of her psyche and created a new body for her.
Fry: You WHAT?
#9: Understand… mentally, she’s the same person. Her memories, emotions,
hopes, dreams, personality… they’re all intact. Her body, on the other
hand, is a duplicate. We took cells from her original body, and spliced in the
cells of the most powerful alien races from across the Multiverse. Daxamite, Delvian,
Saiyian, Kree, Vorta… whatever I could find. The result… a being of
greatly-enhanced strength, speed, and durability. The perfect bodyguard for our
champion. Unfortunately, the genetic mix was imperfect. The extra organs that
showed up on the scans were a result of her various alien physiologies fighting
for dominance. But now, I’ve restored the balance. She’ll be perfectly
healthy and she’ll never have this problem again.
Fry: But… Amy… my Amy… dead?
#9: For all intents and purposes, that IS your Amy. But… yes. Now, remember…
under NO circumstances are you to tell her. The results could be devastating.
Amy (OC): What could be devastating?
(Cut to: she’s on the operating table, trying to sit up)
(#9 pulls his mask back on, and turns to face her)
#9: Nothing. You had a severe case of food poisoning, but it’s been cured.
Get some rest.
Amy: Oh, okay.
(She goes back to sleep)
#9: Be very careful.
Fry: All right.
(Meanwhile…)
Prof: Behold… the Pandimensional Portal! Step through, and it’ll
send you to any one of an infinite number of parallel dimensions, completely at
random! I originally planned to use it as a means of disposing of my vast collection
of subpoenas from the government, but that was before I invented the Bottomless
Hole.
Leela: So you can use this to find Fry and Amy?
Prof: Oh, my, no. Once you step through the portal, there’ll be no way
of retrieving you. You’ll be trapped! Trapped, forever, in whatever freakish
hell dimension the portal deposits you!
Scruffy (looking up from his copy of “Four-Breasted Beauties”): You
could use the diamond tether to anchor her in this dimension, enabling you to
reel her in if she gets in trouble.
Prof: You colossal imbecile, that is the single most absurd idea I’ve
ever heard! Why, I’d be a complete idiot if I even thought of implementing
it! You should be ashamed of yourself, moron!
(Scruffy shrugs)
Prof: Instead, I propose we use the diamond tether to anchor her in this dimension,
enabling us to reel her in if she gets in trouble.
Zoidberg: A brilliant idea that is! And so much better than the one Scruffy
came up with.
Bender: Yeah, get lost, ya loser!
Scruffy: Scruffy’s gonna have to start copyrightin’ his ideas.
(Camera pans like crazy and we see several dimensions before finding our trio
again)
Leela: Fry, quit pacing, you’ll wear a hole in the floor again.
Fry: (stops pacing) Geez, can’t a guy be worried for his friend?
Leela: I’m worried too, but you don’t see me ringing up $500 bills
because of it.
(Amy stirs and both shift their attention to her)
Amy: (Sleepily) Hey guys, sorry about scaring you. I guess I should be more
careful about what I eat in a dimension of toxic waste.
Fry: What are you talking about? That wasn’t the problem. You’re
actually a cl-mfph! (Leela quickly clamps her hand on Fry’s mouth.)
Amy: A what?
Leela: Um allergic to toxic waste. The doctor said to stay away from sewers
from now on.
Amy: Oh. OK, that’s fine by me.
Leela: (whispers to Fry) Ix nay on the lone cay!
Fry: You’re talking funny. What does that have to do with not telling
Amy she’s a clone?
Amy: I’m a WHAT?
Fry: Oops.
(Leela slaps her forehead. Fry tries to undo his mistake, making things worse.)
Fry: Um…afraid of phones! Yeah that’s what I said. I didn’t
say anything about the real Amy dying or her memories and stuff being put into
some sort of super clone.
(Amy’s eyes widen and Fry realizes his mistake and changes topics)
Fry: So you were saying before you had something to tell me?
Amy: (SOTTO) It all makes sense now. (Looks up at Fry) It’s not real.
None of it’s real. (Her eyes tear up and she runs off.)
Leela: (looks angrily at Fry) Nice going! You can’t keep a secret can
you?
Fry: That’s not true. I have secrets nobody knows.
Leela: Name one!
Fry: If I did, they wouldn’t be secret!
Leela: This is going nowhere, I gotta go find Amy before she does something
drastic.
Fry: No, you gotta stay here while I go find her. I spilled the beans and I
gotta make things right again.
Leela: OK, go. To be honest, I was just putting on a brave face anyway.
(Fry runs off in search of their lost friend)
(Amy runs through the strange, but always familiar, city of New New York. She
accidentally knocks down an old man and stops to help him up.)
Amy: I’m so sorry! I didn’t see you.
Old man: Quite all right young lady, I’m unharmed. What of you? Something
must trouble you deeply to run like that. Could it be things are not what they
seem?
Amy: (gasps) How did you know?
Old man: You’d be surprised at what I know, Miss Wong. I know you’re
a forgery, a copy of someone else.
(Amy begins to sob uncontrollably)
Old man: There, there, Miss Wong. Your aches are caused because you know in
your heart, you’re not meant to be here.
Amy: (between sobs) They must have cloned me for some reason. I must be important.
Old man: They cloned you purely for sentimental reasons. It’s not right
for someone to rise after death.
Amy: (sobs) You’re right. What can I do?
Old man: There’s a metal factory right down the street. Jump into the
molten lava. Only then will you find peace.
Amy: OK, I don’t really see any point to exist anymore anyway.
(Just then Fry turns the corner and sees Amy who has already begun to walk
towards the factory)
Fry: Amy! Wait!
(Upon hearing Fry, she breaks into a run. She looks back to see if he follows
her. She seems to have lost him. She enters the building and navigates through
it until she finds the pit of molten metal. She stands at the edge and appears
to think twice. Her mind is made up, though. She prepares to jump.)
Amy: Good-bye, cruel world!
(Suddenly, she’s knocked to the ground by Fry, who had hurled himself
at her to keep her from jumping)
Fry: What were you doing?!
Amy: Ending my now pointless life. I’m dead, Fry. I shouldn’t be
here!
Fry: Yeah, you’re probably right, but that doesn’t change the fact
that you ARE here. You ran out of there so fast that I didn’t even get a
chance to tell you the whole story. You really do need to start sticking around
for the whole thing. (he smiles.)
Amy: I’m listening.
(Fry recounts what the Number 9 man told him)
Amy: Wow, but I can’t be Amy. I just can’t.
Fry: Why not?
Amy: I never felt this strongly before. They must have changed something. I
loved Kif, but now…
Fry: Your feelings for me have gotten stronger?
Amy: I never told…
Fry: Yeah, I know, but I was in the room when you and The Ferror had your little
chat.
Amy: Oh god!
Fry: Amy, listen to me. Did you still have feelings for me after we broke up?
Amy: Yeah. But I know it could never happen, and fell in love with Kif. Now
it’s almost like he’s gone.
Fry: Amy, we’ve been on this little dimension hoppy thing for a while
now. We’re all the other one has. Kif isn’t gone. He’s just not
here. Absence doesn’t always make the heart grow fonder. Trust me, I’m
having the same trouble with Leela. I feel like I’m losing her.
Amy: You have a “living picture” to remind you, though.
Fry: Yeah, she reminds me of the sister I never had. (both laugh.) Seriously,
though, I wouldn’t worry too much about it. Whatever happens will happen
if it’s meant to be. Now let’s go. (trips and falls.)
(Amy giggles and helps him up)
Fry: If anyone asks, that never happened.
Amy: Mum’s the word.
(A short while later, they meet up with Leela. No sooner than they do that,
the door appears)
Leela: We didn’t solve a task, though.
Amy: I think this may have just been a stop-over point by this “Order”
to fix me. Even if it wasn’t, we still found that so long as we have each
other, we can do anything.
Fry: Hey, Amy, who was that old man you were talking to when I found you?
Amy: Old man? Oh no! (slaps her forehead) I was so struck with grief, I wasn’t
thinking. He knew about me, he persuaded me to commit suicide. You don’t
think?
Fry: Looks like I was right. He is still out there.
Leela: I suspect we’ll meet him again, though. Go on! I’m right behind
you!
(Fry and Amy jump through the door. Leela stands silent for a moment)
Leela: Telling him wasn’t part of the plan.
#9: Things have changed.
Leela: I may not remember everything, but don’t I make the changes?
#9: Until you know who and what you are, I’m in command. You’re in
no shape to lead. Just keep an eye on those two.
Leela: If you know who I am, why not tell me?
#9: The Order forbids me to! Now jump before it’s too late!
Leela: (groans and jumps. The doorway closes behind her.)
(At that moment on the REAL Earth)
Professor: Is that diamond tether good and tight?
(Bender checks it.)
Bender: Yep.
Professor: Ready when you are Leela.
Leela: Hang on Fry! I’m coming for you! (She steps through the doorway.) |
