Well here's a post-WGY fic I came up with. As the title states, this is a Futurama/ST: TNG crossover. In the TNG timeline, this takes place around the time of the episodes Unification 1 and 2. Special thanks goes to Red_Line, MC, and Flounder for their assistance.
Chapter 1 – First Contact
Planet Express Ship, Bridge.
The swirling purple wormhole grew larger in the view screen as Leela continued heading straight for it. The rest of the spaces occupants were chanting, encouraging her to go on. Just before the wormhole swallowed the ship, she stole a quick glance at Fry, and then the ship was engulfed by the purple mass, and ventured into the unknown. A few moments later, the ship exited the wormhole, undamaged. Once Leela hit the emergency shut-off for the engines, she did a quick scan of the bridge to see if everyone was fine.
“Amy any sign of the Nimbus?” Leela said.
“Nope, all clear.”
Leela breathed a sigh of relief, then turned to Fry. “Fry, I want you to get up into the turret, just in case we have to start shooting.” She said in soft voice.
“Yes captain!” Fry said, and Leela kissed him on the cheek and he scrambled up to his post.
“Professor can you figure out where we are?” Leela asked. The old man turned from the star map he was studying and adjusted his glasses.
“Eh whaa?” He said
“Have you found out where we are yet?” Leela said
“Oh, my yes. We're completely lost. I have no idea where we are." The old man replied. Leela sighed , and knowing what further argument would produce.
“Professor mon, are ya sure ya don't have any idea where in Babylon we are?'” Hermes Conrad said
"I know where we're not. We're in the middle of nowhere. There isn't an planet, a star, or another life form with a million parsecs ..." There was a sudden explosion and the ship shook violently.
“Sorry Leela! A ship just popped out of nowhere, and it looked like it could be either a Romulan on Klingon cloaking device. I think it maybe Romulan though.” Fry called over the intercom.
“Fry, what in Asimov's name are you talking about? First of all, the Klingons would never attack an unidentifiable ship. And I've never heard of these Romulans.
"Oh my yes, and even I haven't invented a working cloaking device. It would be wonderful if I could have a look at their ship. Imagine the contract I could get from the DOOP for such a device, oh my yes.” The Professor rambled on to no one in particular. Just then there was another loud boom and the ship shook again, this time the lighting flickered and various instrument panels began sparking.
“ABANDON SHIP! Robots and children first! Aw hell, forget the kids. Robots only!” Bender yelled, and began running towards the exit.
“Bender! No one's abandoning ship! Get back your post! Nobody shoots at my ship and gets away with it." Leela fumed. She shoved the stick forward and stomped her boot down. The engines screamed and every loose item on the bridge flew towards the rear as the occupants grabbed for support. "Fry, return fire as soon as we're in range."Leela said.
"Leela, that's a Romulan Bird of Prey. We're no match for their fire power. Let's just cheese it."
“Hey! I'm supposed to say that you jerk wad!” Bender said
“Fry, what on Earth are you talking about?” Leela said
“The ship that attacked us! We're no match for them!”
“Fry, how do you know that?”
“Just trust me Leela!”
Although she hated running from a fight, she knew that Fry was probably right. And besides most of the ships systems were either off-line or just barely functioning. She also knew that since it had been sometime since an overhaul that the ship could probably fall apart any moment.
“I can ju's hear dat Bureaucrat Proctor right now. I knew I should'a packed does death certificates and notices of death/suicide forms.” Hermes said as he started to weep. Labarabra gently hugged him and caressed his head.
“Dere, Dere husband it'll be OK.”
“Hang on everybody, things are going to get a little bumpy.” Leela said, and again mashed the throttle to floor. The ship protested as she threw in several different evasive maneuvers After a few minutes of this, all main power was lost. Thankfully the auxiliary power kicked in and they had basic functions such as life support and communication. The bridge lighting was now emergency red.
“Fry, any sign of that ship that was chasing us?”
“No, wait … I think I see them!” Fry said excitedly. Red laser blasts shot from the turret, but nothing hit. However there were two more green balls of light coming towards the ship. They struck home. The Planet Express ship shook again at the impact. The emergency lighting flickered for a moment, then everything seemed quiet.
“Dammit Fry! I thought you had them!”
“Sorry Leela, but I mean they're cloaked so its not like I can get a lock on them!”
Leela decided not to press the point. She turned to look at Amy, who was ot very happy by the look on her face.
“Well Amy, how bad is it?”
The intern was about answer when the intercom crackled.
"Leela! Leela! It's ... It's ... ship .. you know ..." came Fry's highly excited voice over the intercom.
“Fry, calm down, what's going on?"
“L—Leela, i..t'ss fro-m th-at- s-how S-s-st-ar-t-rek.” Fry continued on. Out of habit, everyone on board let out a loud “shhhh”.
Leela turned to Amy, who was at navigation. “Can you confirm that Amy?”
“Yea, there does appear to be another ship closing in on us.”
“Scruffy suggests that we aks for directions from that there ship"
“The mysterious stranger is right, there is it another ship.” The professor said, turning his attention to the front window.
“Hey, that thing kinda looks like that piece of crap those Star Trek jerks were flying.” said Bender, after taking a swig of beer.
“Can it Bender.” Leela said. The incoming call button lit up on her console. She pressed the answer button and the videophone screen came down. On screen was the bald-headed human male in a red and black uniform. On his collar points were four square shaped gold buttons.
"I am Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the Federation starship USS Enterprise, do you require assistance?” Picard said.
“No, we're perfectly capable of handling the situation ourselves.” Leela said with pride.
“Our sensors show that you've suffered sever damage to your ship. Would you mind telling us who you are?”
Fry's excited voice came over the intercom. "Leela, do you know who that is?" he exclaimed. Before she replied, she hit the mute button on the vid phone.
“No, what and you do?”
“Yeah! That's Captain Picard from Star Trek: The Next Generation. He was good, but I think Kirk was better.”
“Ok, How do you know that?” Leela replied. She turned back to Picard.
“Because I watched the show Leela ”
“Ok, Fry. I’ll trust you on this. Secure the gun and get down here.” Leela replied. She turned back to Picard.
“Sorry about that captain, anyway I'm Captain Turanga Leela of the Planet Express Ship, registered to Planet Express Delivery Co. New New York City Earth.” Leela said.
She got a puzzled look from Picard.
“Earth? On Earth there's no such place as New New York City. Would you care to explain?”
Leela was confused. “Yes, well on the other side of the wormhole there is a New New York City, which was built on top the ruins of Old New York. Wait a minute...what year is this? Where are we?”
“Today is Stardate 45208.3, and we are near the Romulan Neutral Zone." As Picard was speaking, Fry slid down the ladder and took a position behind Leela so he could also see the screen.
"Romulan Neutral Zone?"
Fry spoke up. "Captain Picard! I know exactly where we are! That Bird of Prey was using a cloaking device, wasn't it?"
"Yes son, it was. Who are you?"
"Philip J. Fry, delivery boy, sir!" He came to attention and rendered a salute.
Leela saw Picard glance off screen, then another voice spoke. “Captain, our sensors indicate that their ship’s tachyon signature indicates recent exposure to dimensional instability.”
Just then the professor, who had fallen asleep standing near the pilot's chair, woke up. The viewscreen heard a snort and turned toward him; he looked at Captain Picard. “Tachyons? Why those are just a figment of some science fiction writer's imagination. Why this blinking light here indicates that this ship has a chronoton signature that indicates recent exposure to dimensional instability. Pfft, tachyons. Who ever heard of such a thing?” The Professor said as he wandered back to the sofa.
Leela let out a sigh, trying to conceal her annoyance at the professor’s interruption.
“I see, well if it would be convenient to have you beam over to the Enterprise for further discussion. Mr. Fry is welcome to come, too.”
“What do you mean beam over?”
“I take it you don't have transporter technology where you come from?” Picard said, raising an eyebrow. This time the professor approached the videophone.
“Oh my yes, all though it's very unstable and is only used for hazardous waste disposal and celebrity appearances, and there are a few accidents a year, those poor bastards. Such a waste of good organs, oh my yes.” The professor said as wandered off again. Fry then slid down the ladder from the turret and walked up to Leela.
“The transporters they use have been in use for over two centuries, and they are perfectly safe. Well, except for that one time in TMP when they failed re-materialize Commander Sonak, although he kinda deserved it, Spock is much better. But using the transporter is perfectly safe Leela.” Fry said. They looked at each other for a moment, then back at the screen as Picard spoke.
“It looks like Mr. Fry is quite knowledgeable about transporters. I assure you, the transporter is perfectly safe. Before we beam you over, we’ll tow your ship in our tractor beam. Does that satisfy you Captain?” Picard replied.
“I suppose, but what about the damage to our ship?”
“We’ll do the best we can in our main shuttle bay. Are you prepared to beam over?”
“Give me moment to decided who’s coming.” Leela said. Soon, she felt the pull of the Enterprise’s tractor beam.
“I guess Fry and I will beam over then, the rest of you can stay here until we get into the cargo bay.”
“Now wait just minute, ya know ya goin to need a bureaucrat dere to handle all dey necessary paperwork. I dink dat ya should bring me along as well.” Hermes said. Leela thought for a moment.
“All right, I guess that would make sense. Amy you’re in charge while I’m gone.” Leela said, the intern nodded in acceptance of her order.
“Now wait just a damn minute Leela! I own this ship, and I decide who’s in charge.” The Professor said angrily.
“OK, Professor.” Leela said calmly.
“OK, what? Who are you people and what's that thing?” Farnsworth replied, pointing at Zoidberg.
“Amy, you're in charge while I’m gone. Try and keep the ship in order, and don’t let Bender steal anything.” Leela said, ignoring the professor, who was now asleep. The intern nodded in acceptance of her order.
“Captain Picard, there will be three of us to beam over.”
“Understood, stand by.”
Fry, Leela, and Hermes were then bathed in blue-white light and were dematerialized.
Transporter Room 3, USS Enterprise, NCC-1701-D.
Assigned to meet the newcomers were four humans and one obvious alien. The transporter pad came to life, and three beams of blue white light shimmered and Fry, Leela, and Hermes materialized.
Leela and Hermes both were slightly disorientated. Hermes was bent over, looking like he was about to hurl, while Leela was a little dizzy. Fry on the other hand was completely fine.
“Ooh, I dink I’m going to be sick. Thank Jah dat I remembered does notices of illness forms.” Hermes said, holding his stomach. Leela just nodded in reply.
"Are you kidding? That was cool! I wanna do that again!" Fry said. Both Hermes and Leela looked at him like he was crazy. Looking at the familiar crew members that had been sent to meet them, Fry said, indicating each in turn, "Oh, snap! We get Number One, Worf, some yellow shirts, and Counselor Troi. Rrrrrrrrrrrr....
Leela let out a quite ahem and gently elbowed Fry. "Shut up, Fry," Leela said. Looking at the one Fry called Number One, she said, “I’m Turanga Leela, Captain of the Planet Express ship, this is our deliv.. logistics specialist.. Philip J. Fry, and our bureaucrat Hermes Conrad. Permission to come aboard?”
Looking out of the corner of his eye at Troi, the man said, “Granted. Welcome aboard the Enterprise, I’m Commander Will Riker, the first officer."
“Thank you, Commander.” Leela said, as she and the others stepped off the transporter pad. They then exchanged handshakes. After sensing there wasn't a threat to the ship, Worf dismissed the two security personnel. The group then left the transporter room.
“Is Captain Picard available?” Leela asked as they walked down the curving hallway. They occasionally got strange looks from other crew members they passed. Fry was still in a bit of shock and continued to gawk at his surroundings.
“The captain is waiting for you in the Observation Lounge, along with the rest of the command staff.” Riker said
“Cool! We'll get to meet Data, LaForge, and Dr. Crusher!” Fry said excitedly. Riker looked at him curiously, but let it go. As they were walking, Fry whispered to Leela “Don't worry, Dr. Crusher has actually had medical training and is a lot better than Zoidberg.”
“Fry, I know this is exciting for you, but please try and control yourself. Remember, we are representatives of our universe.” Leela said, pulling Fry in close. As they made their way towards the lounge, Fry still gawked at various Enterprise crew members, occasionally pointing one out he remembered from the show.
They walked on for few more minutes, until Riker stopped at a doorway. “Well here we are." He said. The door swooshed open like they were all used too back home, and everyone entered, except for Fry who waited for moment to see if the door would close on him. Leela sighed and pulled him gently into the room.
When they entered the conference room, Picard was standing at the head of an oak conference table. To his right was a humanoid women, wearing a uniform similar to Picards, except that it was blue. Seated next to her was a dark skinned human with a visor around his eyes. To the left of Picard sat another humanoid, this one having a green tint to his skin. Both of them had on gold colored uniforms. Picard stood to greet them.
"Welcome to the Enterprise. Let me introduce.." Picard started saying until interrupted by Fry.
"Wow! This is so cool! Leela, Hermes, this is Dr. Beverly Crusher. Much less annoying than Dr. Pulaski, although her son is just so aggravating. Anyway, the guy with the visor is Commander Geordie LaForge. He used to be the ship's pilot but he got promoted to Chief engineer. I don't remember how that happened, though. Oh, snap! I forgot about Data. He's a robot, but not like Bender. No alcohol and no crime." Mistaking the looks of confusion on his friend's faces, he said, "Yeah, I know. How can you have a robot that isn't a drunken criminal?" When he was finished, Fry looked around the room and saw that not only his friends were confused but that Picard and the rest of the Enterprise crew were as well.
“I am curious to know Mr. Fry, how is it that you seem to know so much about us?” Picard said as he and everyone else took their seats.
“Well you see in our….”Fry started to say until Leela nudged him.
“Captain, is that really that important right now? I mean I think there’s much more important matters at stake here.” Leela said.
“Yes der is. As a representative of da Central Bureaucracy, it is my duty to have ya sign and stamp da followin’ forms.” Hermes began, taking out his briefcase and setting up on the table. Opening it, he took out a stack of paper, separated by several paper clips. He also retrieved his trusty Central Bureaucracy issued stamp, and a ball point pen. “Now I’ll just have ya sign dese here forms, which are as follows. We got da Contamination of Inter-dimensional Zone, Release of Medical Liability for Diseases Encountered..”
“Excuse me, Mr. ?” Picard asked, interrupting Hermes.
“Conrad.”
”Mr. Conrad, since we are in very pressing situation, I’ll have Mr. Riker here put you in touch with Starfleet Administration and they can handle it from there.”
“I suppose dat would satisfy da requirements, but I’ll still need ya signature mon.” Hermes said, pointing at the stack of paper.
“I will sign your forms in due time Mr. Conrad. Now can we got on with an explanation of what exactly is going on?” Picard said. Hermes narrowed his eyes and adjusted his glasses.
“Sorry, mon. No signature, no explanation. It's listed explicitly on page 36, in da Release of Medical Liability form, section 305, paragraph 2, line 5.” Hermes said, flipping through to the appropriate page, and showed it to Picard. After reviewing the page, Picard handed it to Riker and then back to Hermes.
“Mr. Conrad, do you think that we can set aside your protocols for a moment, so that we can figure out to do with you people?” Picard said, slightly irritated.
“I'm sorry, mon. Article 3 of the Bureaucrat's Code: Never do anything without the proper stamps and signatures. Since you inexplicably don't seem to have a Bureaucrat on board dis vessel, as Captain, you are required to sign these forms before I can continue. Dat's da way it is, mon. Oh and your first officer and second officer also need to sign.”
“I'm sorry Captain. He is insistent about these things, anal even.” Leela said.
“Only 99.57% of the time, mon.”
Picard glanced at Riker, and then to Data. “I suppose that we might as well get this paperwork out of the way so we can get something done.”
Hermes face broke into a smile, he then began passing out the papers and pens. Hermes then went around the table and showed Picard and Riker where to sign. During the twenty minutes that it took to get the documents signed, an awkward silence filled the room with the only noise coming from Hermes' humming of a Jamaican tune. When they were finished signing, Hermes took the stack of forms, double checked to make sure everything was properly signed. Next he then stamped all the forms five times. Finally, he took everything and placed it in his briefcase and snapped it shut.
"I suppose that we can now get that explanation?" Riker said.
"Ya mon, we can now give ya dat explanation." Hermes said, nodding towards Leela.
"Sorry about all this bureaucratic BS, but in our universe, the Central Bureaucracy runs just about everything and they can be real jerks about such things." Leela said.
"I see, now can you please tell us how you got here, and what kind of repairs or supplies you'll need?" Picard said, with a hint of irritation.
"I was just getting to that captain. You see, where we come from its 3010, and we were trying to evade a ship that was attacking us. We were involved in trying to save a violet dwarf star and it’s precious ecosystem from being destroyed to make way for a galactic-size miniature golf course. “
Riker raised an eyebrow "So what you're saying is that you are all fugitives?" He said.
“Yeah, um well, technically we are, but not really. Ever since Earth President Richard Nixon made saving the environment a crime…” Leela started to say until she noticed the blank looks on everyone’s faces, except for the one Fry called Data.
“She could be referring to the 37th President of the United States, Richard M. Nixon who served from 1969 to 1974 until he resigned due to a scandal know as Watergate….” Data said until Picard raised his hand.
“Thank you Data, now is this the same man?”
“Yea, except now he’s just a head in a jar.” Fry said.
“A head in a jar? What’s that all about?” Dr. Crusher asked, out of medical curiosity.
“In our universe…” Leela started to say until there was a beep form the comm system.
“Shuttle Bay 1 to the captain.”
“Picard here, what is it?”
“The guests’ ship has been safely docked and secured in the main shuttle bay.”
“Very well. We’ll be down in a minute. Picard out.”
“Number One, Mr. LaForge, and Mr. Data you three and I can accompany our guests to the shuttle bay, the rest of you are dismissed.” Picard said, everyone then got up and returned to the bridge while Fry, Leela, and Hermes accompanied Picard and Riker toward the shuttle bay
While they were on their way to the shuttle bay, Fry approached Captain Picard.
"So what kind of mission was the Enterprise on today captain?" Fry asked. Picard looked at the young red head, still wanting to know how this young man knew so much about them.
"I'm sorry Mr. Fry, but that information is classified." Picard said.
"Fry, come here a moment." Leela said. Fry slowed his pace and walked next to her. She took his hand and pulled him in close.
"Fry, I want this to go as smoothly as possible. So please don't make this difficult and stay out of the captains way all right?" She said in a low voice.
Fry nodded his head acknowledging Leela's request.
"But I was going to aks him about the holodeck, cause there's something I want you to see."
"You can aks after we're through with repairing the ship. OK?"
Fry bowed his head in defeat, but he did notice though that Leela had not let go of his hand, and their fingers were now intertwined. Fry just smiled has the group continued to the shuttle bay.
In the shuttle bay, a team of engineering personnel in yellow uniforms were going over the Planet Express Ship with tricorders and other scanning devices. Inside however, was a different story. Before they had left Earth to rescue Leela and the other feministas, Bender had made sure that he packed a large supply of booze just in case they didn't come home. He was now in the cargo bay going through the boxes trying to find his supply. He got to a box marked 'Bender's Booze' and opened it. Inside he found all the bottles broken and liquid running everywhere. "My booze! My precious booze! Stupid meatbags, they'll pay for this!" Bender said to himself. He left the box where it was and stormed off to the bridge.
Once there, he confronted Amy who was cuddling with Kif on the couch. "Hey rich girl! Big Boots back yet?" Bender said, causing her to fall off the couch.
"Bender! No she's not back yet. What's your problem?"
"Well because of her, my supply of booze is gone! I'm going to find out if I can get my booze replaced. Those jerks better compensate me for my loss or somebody's pending for a bending." Bender said as he turned and stomped off the bridge.
When Picard and the rest of the PE crew entered the shuttle bay, they were surprised to see Bender violently shaking one of the crew members and across the bay. They could hear Bender shouting "I demand to see your captain! I want compensation for my booze!" Picard, Riker, Data and Leela jogged over to the scene.
"Bender! I told you to stay in the ship until I got back!" Leela shouted.
"Listen here Big Boots, I wouldn't be here if my booze wasn't destroyed!" Bender said, pointing a Zuban cigar at her. In response she narrowed her eye, giving her that 'I'm going to kill you Bender' look. The two stared down for a few seconds until Picard interrupted, "Would you mind telling us about this robot?"
Leela broke her stare with Bender and faced Picard. "Oh sorry, this is Bender Rodriguez, a bending unit." Taking a few steps away from Bender she continued. "If I were you, I'd lock up any valuables you might have and your doors. He's also a crook." She whispered. The three glanced at each other, not noticing that Bender had rejoined them."So you skin tubes figure out how to compensate me?"
Picard looked at Bender curiously, "What is it that you need Mr. Rodriguez?"
"Well, first off I would like to know who this chump is." Bender said, pointing at Data.
"I am Lieutenant Commander Data, I am an android, not a robot." Data said. Bender stepped up next to him and put an arm around Data.
"So tell me how you're so calm about the fact that a whole box of very useful booze just got wasted?" Bender said, walking away from the rest of the crew.
Data glanced at Bender, confused by his statement. "I am not sure what you mean. I do not require any kind of substance to stay active."
Bender stopped and glared suspiciously at Data. "You mean that booze does nothing for you?"
"I am still not sure what you mean Bender."
"Listen here jerkbot, either you take me to where I can restock my supply, or there's going to be some destructive bending going on."
"In that case, I will take you to Ten Forward." Data said, then he and Bender exited the shuttle bay.
As the two left the shuttle bay, Picard turned to Leela “Would you care to explain what that was about?” he asked pointedly.
Leela sighed.
“Sorry captain, but you see in our universe robots run on alcohol and if they run out they become sober, acting like humans do when they’re drunk.”
"That still doesn't explain why your robot was roughing up one of my crewmen."
"Oh don't worry about captain, that's just Bender being Bender. He does that all the time." Fry said nonchalantly.
Picard was about to reply when LaForge approach the group holding a padd. "I don't mean to interrupt, but we've finished our examination of the ship, and it doesn't look good."
As LaForge was about to explain what condition the ship was in, the remaining members of the Planet Express crew exited the ship, with Amy and Kif leading and the Professor trailing behind. The professor stepped of the landing and examined the area around him.
“Who are you, and what are you young people doing on my ship?” He said angrily.
“Your ship? Sir, you’re on the Federation Starship Enterprise.” Riker said
“The Federation? Pfft. They haven’t existed for five hundred years. Wiped out by those barbaric Klingons. Or was it the Ewoks? At my age, one ancient wiped out civilization is the same as the next. Now who the hell are you people?”
“Uh Professor, isn’t time for your afternoon nap?” Leela said.
”Oh fuf. Afternoon naps are for senile old people. Now who are all of you and what are you doing on my ship?". The Professor then fell asleep standing up.
“Now, about your ship-“ LaForge started to say, until Zoidberg waddled down the steps.
“What’s this? Friends are talking? About me perhaps?”
“Dr. Zoidberg, where have you been?” Leela asked
“I vaz investigating this strange scent from the cargo bay and found some delicious week old pizza. So good, if it only had anchovies. And I’m up for anything tonight.”
“Uh sorry doc, we’re kinda busy. How about one those yellow shirts shows you the food replicators?” Fry interjected.
“If it has anything to do with food I’m available!”
Picard called over an ensign. “Ensign would you take our guest to Ten Forward?” The ensign nodded and led Zoidberg out the bay.
“What was that creature?” Picard asked.
“Oh that’s our doctor, at least we let him think that. Now what about our ship?” Leela said.
The group gathered around LaForge who was scrolling through a padd. "Well to start off the drive system is totally alien, I've never seen anything like it. And their explanations of how it works ... well, it just violates every known law of physics there is. They said it used to run on dark matter, which exists only in physicist's theories, but because of a shortage in their universe it now runs on ... get this ... whale oil. The old man, who claims to have built the thing, is a complete crackpot, and their engineering intern, Ms. Wong, while she seems knowledgeable, is your stereotypical bimbo who can't walk five meters without tripping, slipping, or dropping something."
Amy glared at LaForge, who just ignored it and continued with his report.
"Anyway, the rest of the ship I can figure out, and it's a doozy. Captain, there are vacuum tubes in that thing. Those haven't been used by anyone for anything except rock musicians and high end audio nuts in hundreds of years. I've found coolant leaks patched with duct tape, exposed electrical wires, hatches held closed with bungee cords. In one place there's what looks like a laser hole in the hull that patched with a flattened anchovy can held in with what looks like modeling clay."
"But you know what they say their most serious problem is? You're not gonna believe this - their coke syrup tank is ruptured and they're down to less than two liters of it left.”
Picard raised an eyebrow, “You’re right Mr. LaForge I can’t believe it.” Turning to Leela, “Ma’am would you mind elaborating on some Mr. LaForge’s findings? And I wouldn’t mind hearing about why your ship is in such bad shape.”
Leela squirmed slightly, not sure how to best answer Picard's question. She was about to reply when the comm badge on Picard's uniform chirped.
"Bridge to the captain."
"Yes what is it Mr. Worf?"
"We've arrived at Starbase 234; Admiral Brackett is requesting permission to beam board."
"Granted, have her meet me in my ready room. "
"Aye sir. Bridge out."
Picard turned his attention back to the PE crew.
"I'm sorry, but I must depart. There are important matters regarding the security of the Federation that I must attend to."
"I understand captain, we'll be sure to inform you of the progress of the repairs." Leela replied.
"Good. Number One, will you show our guests to their quarters?"
"Aye sir. If you'll follow me please?" Riker said.
With that, the entire party departed the shuttle bay, the still sleeping professor being carried by Fry like a baby.
"Husband! Just where in Jah's name do ya think ya goin?" LaBarbara said as she stormed down the steps. The group froze and Hermes cautiously approached his wife.
"Sweet Zombie Jesus! Where hav ya been woman?" Hermes exclaimed. LaBarbara stormed down the steps and confronted her husband.
"I was in da middle of going of going to da bathroom when I found dis." She said, while holding what looked to be a sort of miniature camera. Hermes adjusted his glasses to study the device. On the metal casing an inscription read 'Property of BBR Productions'
"Dis looks like one Bender's spy cams. Thank ya for bringin dis my attention me wife. At least dis will give me somethin to focus on." Hermes said. He put the device in his briefcase and said "Now wife, Mr. Riker here was going to show us to our quarters."
Hermes then rejoined the group with LaBarbara following him.
