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Note: This story is set after "A Big Piece Of Garbage" and deals
with Leela's thoughts about major events of the episode. This story also has nothing
to do with a book of the same title that I wrote and got published. The book is
currently published in electronic format, but will be published also in print
by another publisher later. To see the electronic version or obtain a copy, go
to this
site
Much has happened over the past few days since Fry first discovered that burning
piece of garbage that would soon impact Earth. It's lucky he found it, otherwise
New New York would be nothing but a stinky crater. Fry however wishes that he
never found it. After all, he still hasn't gotten that disgusting odor he smelled
from the Smelloscope when he discovered it. Also, I never did think his joke about
Uranus was funny. It was renamed to Urectum. But isn't that similar to the previous
name? After all, what's an anus? And what's a rectum?
Fry is still watching lots of television. Sometimes I tell him that there are
more things in life that entertain us, not just television. But all he heard was
anus from "entertain us". I still don't get the joke.
When Farnsworth first told us of the impending impact of the garbage ball,
we were all terrified. "What's going to happen to the world?" I asked
myself. And all Bender did was steal the professor's television.
Later, after Farnsworth showed us his discovery of the garbage crisis of New
York, Fry said that the only thing the Internet was used for was downloading pornography.
I'll never forget the way he looked at the screen when that female doctor removed
her lab coat, exposing a skimpy revealing bikini. Sometimes I just don't understand
men. And I thought only Zapp Brannigan was into sex and pornography.
When I criticized New York in the twentieth century, Fry got mad at me and
defended his home time. Today, he realizes that he was wrong... too.
Later, When the mayor's secretary revealed a message from Neptune about the
approaching garbage ball that passed, I remember feeling a little scared. This
thing is getting closer and closer. In just a few days, New New York would be
bombarded by burning garbage and destroyed. Nothing could stop it. It was all
up to the professor.
In a spoof-off of the twentieth century movie "Armageddon", we blasted
off to the garbage ball, carrying a bomb that the professor had designed. I remember
how excited Fry was to see all this trash from his old time. He never even wanted
to be a part of this mission. To him, all that trash up there reminded him of
what he left behind when he was cyrogenetically frozen. But it took some plastic
soda pop rings to literally choke that feeling out of him.
But when we turned on the bomb, we made a shocking discovery: the professor
had built it all wrong! It wasn't set for twenty-five minutes, but rather, twenty-five
seconds! It seemed that we would have to stay with it to complete our mission,
but that was not the case for us. We threw the bomb up into the air, where it
exploded. Unfortunately, we had doomed New New York to its fate.
Upon reporting our failure to the professor and the mayor, Farnsworth couldn't
understand. He had built the bomb according to the book, but he had it upside
down. Wernstrom said he had a solution, but instead, he asked for a lab, a grant,
and graduate students. When asked for his plan, all he said was that he was set
for life. Then he walked out. The nerve of that guy! Leaving us to die horribly
while he lived on with everything he had tricked the mayor into giving him. I
have very few enemies, but he just made the list!
Meanwhile, chunks of garbage began to fall to New New York, destroying everything.
It was like the day of the Apocalypse. What could we do now?
Fry then suggesting fighting garbage with...garbage? What the hell kind of
idea is this? Farnsworth then realized that if we made another garbage ball of
equal proportions, we could divert the first garbage ball off its course. Soon,
Fry had everyone littering, not just in the city, but all over the city.
Finally, we had another garbage ball ready for launch. Wernstrom didn't think
this plan would work, but we had to risk it. The fate of the city and the smell
of fresh air depended on it!
Farnsworth started to count down, but then he counted up. I told Fry to push
the button. Like the klutz he was, Fry missed. But then he tried again and succeeded.
We launched the ball up towards its target. I could hear Fry's heart beating,
along with the professor. He sounded almost dead. And Bender's heart sounded like
a drum.
Although we didn't see it, the garbage ball we created collided with the first
one, sending it flying, right into the sun. Using the Smelloscope, Farnsworth
confirmed the result.
Thanks to his help in saving the city, Farnsworth was awarded the award that
the mayor had confiscated from Wernstrom. He finally felt like a true scientist.
And he had Fry, his great great great...oh screw it, nephew.
But one question lingers in my mind: what about the other garbage ball? Fry
said that it won't return to Earth for hundreds of years. I just pray that when
it does, Earth will be prepared. The future holds the answer.
The End |
